Finding Right Balance


Within ourselves

Sometimes we humans forget that we are part of Nature.

As with other aspects of Nature, there seems to be an inherent “balance” that can be optimal in order for humans to be – or to become – our “best selves.” For plants (depending upon the species) there is an optimal balance of sun and shade, of rain, of minerals in the soil – factors that facilitate the plant becoming its optimal self.

Humans forget that the same is true for us. There is an “ideal” balance that facilitates our being or becoming our best selves.

Many of the necessary factors seem to have been forgotten over the course of history. Once upon a time, we were in better harmony with Nature. We were more integrated into community; we had a sense of “belonging.” Caring for others and for the common welfare served us better than what we have evolved into.

Finding right balance within oneself is a matter of our tuning in to various aspects of our lives, and “listening” with all our senses, to what feels right energetically, what feels right personally, interpersonally, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually…
  • How do we tell if work and play are in right balance?

  • How do we tell if giving and taking are in right balance?

  • What cues and clues do we get that we are out of right balance?

  • What are the component vectors that we ask ourselves about?


Model of Wholeness

The factors in the model below are just some one the ones that I have thought about. Which are the important variables for each individual to be attentive to? And how do we learn to attend?


In this second set of images, one can notice that certain spokes are longer, others are shorter. 



Finding our way back to balance…

Realistically we humans are not always completely evenly matched in every area, but we can at least become more conscious – and think about what right balance might mean. And think about the implications of NOT being in right balance…

What are the consequences if we give too much? Give too little? Ignore our creative needs? Ignore our connection with nature?

What if we turn out to be giving for the wrong reasons? Blocked from receiving even more than we are aware? Don’t we risk depleting ourselves?

What if we surge toward adventurousness but do not engage in sufficient self-care, are we putting ourselves at unnecessary risk?

What if our attention is too much outward and not enough engaged in inner self-reflection or self-awareness, doesn’t that also risk self-depletion?

This website is largely about restoring the right balance between humans and Mother Earth, between humans and other species, and between and amongst one another.

There are many aspects involved in the exploration to find what is our “right” balance. An internal exploration might need to come first, which is why this section of the website comes first.

If we imagine humans as having various traits, endeavors, or various capacities – some of these occur in polarities and require attention to balance. How much are we open to giving? How much are we open to receiving? What is the optimal balance within each of us and with regard to our environment? How much of our attention goes outward? How much do we need to cast some attention inward? Be aware of our emotions, be aware of our motives, be aware of our internal processes?

Too much or too little in either direction can throw us off balance.

How much energy do we expend in work? In play? In creativity? In Nature? How much of our time is with community and how much in solitude?

My assertion is that – as thinking beings- it is our responsibility to attend to these areas of balance and imbalance.

In actuality, although the images above are two-dimensional, we are really three-dimensional. We might conceptualize ourselves more like this:


Internal Family Systems

The factors in the model below are just some one the ones that I have thought about. Which are the important variables for each individual to be attentive to? And how do we learn to attend?

Internal family systems therapy conceptualizes us as being made up of parts. (Richard Schwartz, and others, see below.) These parts can often be in polarities with opposite ways of being (as suggested in my diagrams above) or can operate independently from one another,

Internal family systems therapy is one methodology we can use to get to better know and understand our component parts, and to come to understand whether or not we are in the “optimal” balance for our own highest functioning, and to function in our “best balance” with others.

Schwartz, R.C. (2001). Introduction to the internal family systems model. Oak Park IL: Trailheads Publications, The Center for Self Leadership.
Schwartz, R.C. (1995). Internal family systems therapy. New York, NY: Guilford Press. Published in paperback in 1997.
Schwartz, R.C. & Sweezy, M. (2020). Internal Family Systems Therapy (2nd ed.). New York NY: Guilford Press.



Finding Right Balance

My premise is that we first need to be coming from a place of personal “Right Balance,” with more accurate self-appraisal within ourselves, that we next need to develop the interpersonal skills needed to meet the Other with fairness and equal respect, mutuality and reciprocity, and that only with those skills in place can we bring our minds and hearts to bear on the issues facing us with regard to overall “Right Balance” systemically. The website is divided into three areas of “Right Balance”...


Finding right balance within oneself is a matter of our tuning into, acknowledging, healing, and relating to the many various aspects of ourselves...


Relates to how individuals in a dyad connect with one another, attune to one another, and care about the well-being of both dyad members to honor the common good.


How do we create systems and societies that bring us back into harmony with humanity as a whole, and with nature itself?

“It seems (to me) that we have done a lot of harm thus far, to the planet, to the resources that were held in Mother Earth, to other species, and if we do not MAJORLY turn our beliefs and our behaviors around, life as we have known it will be over.”

Deborah Brenner-Liss

Resources + Reading

From the Blog

Explore a few of the recent posts and join the conversation…
The David Suzuki Foundation

The David Suzuki Foundation

The David Suzuki Foundation, founded in 1990, ( has as its guiding principles:

One nature. We are nature. All people, and all species.

We are interconnected with nature, and with each other.

What we do to the planet and its living creatures, we do to ourselves.

Stay connected

Featured Resource

A New Earth

by Eckhart Tolle

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